How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

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Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by Stormers1972 » 22 Jun 2017, 06:35

Guys, thanks for your comments and praise - it really is appreciated.

I did not see the boobs request as dehumanising. These stories are, after all, intended to be of a sexual nature so it would be a bit difficult, and hypocritical, to be offended by such a request. Bear in mind too that these stories will eventually span a 20 year period, so things like boob sizes are likely to change over the years (for the better I am pleased to say, as a fan of big boobs). They will come into play (Sometimes literally!) a bit later and I will be sure to be descriptive to help with the stories. After all I believe a good story should aim to put the reader at the scene as best as possible, and not rely too much on their imagination.

Chapter 26 has been written, but it was a bit of a haphazard affair written during the middle of a sleepless night, so I wasn't all that happy with it. I will do a rehash over the weekend and publish it when it is fit to be published.

As for writing a book - a lovely thought, but I don't think I am anywhere near that standard, and my stories will always be on this site where I believe we should all share our experiences being such a small community, and not seek financial profit from one another.

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Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by Stormers1972 » 24 Jun 2017, 09:26

Chapter 26: The Works Christmas Party

The night I have eagerly been looking forward to all week has arrived – Marie’s works Christmas party.

I have been tingling with excitement the whole day, knowing that I will finally get to meet Marie’s rude bad-mannered friends - friends that turned my girlfriend from the tarty show-off I was familiar with to the outright shameless slut she is now.

The night starts like most of our Saturday nights out – me sitting on the sofa waiting for her to come downstairs, wondering just how revealing her latest slutty new outfit will be, this time a new dress ordered from one of her club book, along with yet another pair of heels, carefree about the debt she is building up, to her just a small sacrifice to pay for having a wardrobe full of increasingly sluttish attire.

When she walks into the lounge I am, as always, mesmerised by her sheer beauty. Shoulder length blonde hair perfectly groomed, framing her pretty face outlined by her usual make-up - red lipstick and eyeliner. However, her long purple velvet dress is surprisingly respectable. Tight, certainly, with her boobs firmly jutting out, the material taut over her hips emphasising her hourglass figure, the hemline below her knees, with just a modest amount of leg on show in her black tights. Teetering on high heeled black stiletto open toed sandals, the ankle strap detail is the only suggestion of sluttyness from her outfit.

“Do you like it?” she asks and gives a twirl allowing me to briefly admire her figure underneath, observing how the tight material fits snugly over her bum emphasising the generous curves underneath, yet somehow it still fails to meet my expectations. I worry that maybe I have built the night up too much, thinking about it all week, anticipation building to sheer excitement all day today, and now here she is in probably the most respectable looking outfit I have seen her wear for ages.

Without waiting for a response to her question she sits down on the sofa and that changes everything. I now discover that her dress has a long split up the side, a split that goes all the way to the very top of her leg, the dress gaping open and putting her lovely shapely thigh fully on display. Taking a cigarette from her handbag she lights it, takes a puff, and as she blows the smoke out she lifts her right leg, crossing it over the other, now putting so much thigh on show that the control tops of her tights are showing.

We meet up round her colleague Kirsty’s house. When she opens the door the sight that greets me exceeds any expectations I had about her. This is the woman in her mid twenties who Marie has amusingly described on many occasions as doing “really loud burps”. The wavy haired brunette was chubby, a size 18 at a guess, and has absolutely massive boobs. Marie’s were impressive, but Kirsty’s were just off the scale big. Right now she is standing there in a lacy black top and what surely had to be a push-up bra underneath. They jutted out, defying gravity, and were just in your face humungous, and very obviously shown off.

We are led into the lounge where Kirsty’s husband stands, not that I really notice him as Jeanette, Marie’s other friend from work, was sitting on the sofa and another sight to behold. A petite blonde with stunning features, sitting demurely on the sofa in a silk white dress with high heels, and the smoothest looking legs I have ever seen. No tights, despite the cold weather, and her dress is very short indeed, intentionally showing off her best assets just like her friend.

We are given drinks and I stand awkwardly watching Jeanette pick up a toy and start playing with Kirsty’s cat. She leans to one side, her legs opening slightly, giving a quick glimpse of silk panties underneath her dress. I’m treated to a few more shows as she continues playing with the cat, shifting her legs about on the sofa, and it becomes obvious that rather than being an accidental flashing of her underwear, she was blatantly putting them on show.

After drinks we walk to the nearby social club for the party. Jeanette and Kirsty walk in front of us, Kirsty’s husband tagging alongside, and I’m entranced by these two contrasting women, one big, one petite, both with their heels clacking on the pavement in front of us.

A group of blokes walk past in the opposite direction and a loud deep sounding burp comes from the trio in front of us. The burp was so big and bassy sounding that I thought it was Kirsty’s husband. But then I see his head turned to the side with a long-suffering expression as he watches his wife let out her boisterously big burp.

The blokes walking past all turn to look at her, and then at each other all with equally shocked expressions, and naturally shocking them was her very intention, striding along now with those big boobs jutting and bouncing in front of her, and I bet she had the same proud look on her face Marie always gets after letting out one of her loud burps. Marie looks at the blokes looking at each other, then looks at me and smiles letting me know how proud she is of her friend.

I certainly see where she gets it from now, the burp was huge and would easily have been heard halfway down the street. It is exactly the sort of burp I had heard Marie do literally hundreds of times now, and Marie looked just as amused by her friend letting it out as she does when she does similar herself.

At the party we buy drinks, find a table, and sit down together. Jeanette mentions a bloke that has started working in the factory, and all three women start comparing notes about his bum, neither Kirsty nor Marie caring about their other halves being in their presence as they make lewd suggestive comments about the bloke they all obviously fancy.

“I bet he’s got a massive cock too!” Jeanette says, her words defying her demure pretty appearance.

“I’m surprised you haven’t found out yet!” Kirsty fires back “You know about most blokes cocks in the factory!”

Jeanette smiles a response back, glancing at both her female companions, a shared and secret moment exchanged between them.

Marie then picks that moment to suggest I go to the bar, and leave the girls to it. Kirsty suggests likewise to her husband. It is the first time since arriving either of us have been acknowledged, the girls all chatting to each other as if we didn’t even exist.

We oblige and stand at the bar and make awkward conversation together. It isn’t long before the trio of tarts have attention, a few blokes going over to speak to them, and it is obvious from the gestures that the blokes are trying their luck, and that the women are openly flirting with them. Looking now at Marie sitting there in her dress with the split up the side showing off all her thigh as she flirts with her male colleagues right in front of me is intensely arousing.

Later that night I join up again with Marie after a few drinks, and we walk to the bar together, her leading the way.

There is a crowd of people at the bar – more blokes from the factory, these ones with their wives and girlfriends. Marie pushes her way through them, and they separate to make room for her, Marie letting out a throaty burp as she walks through them knowing they are all looking at the new arrival who has just pushed her way between them.

There is a mixture of reactions. The blokes mostly look embarrassed as if caught out, their partners all looking at her scornfully, and I had a moment of clarity. It was obvious that the blokes all fancied her, looking embarrassed that the dirty slut from work is up to her usual antics, but now in front of their other halves, looking sheepish.

Marie looks over her shoulder at me and smiles sweetly, letting them all see her smile after letting out such a brash burp, her amusement seeming to increase both the her male audiences embarrassment, and the females obvious hostility. I realise too that she knew exactly what she was doing, and that she had got exactly the response she had hoped for.

In the taxi home Marie is both drunk and horny, yet another opportunity for a taxi driver to look in his rear view mirror and watch a drunken slut practically having sex with her boyfriend in the back of his cab. Back home she stretches out on the sofa and when I get the camera out she giggles and poses for some photos, sprawled out with her dress gaping open until I put the camera down with a shaky hand and join her on the sofa.

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Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by Stormers1972 » 24 Jun 2017, 10:03

Chapter 27: Late Night Burps In The Street

On Boxing Day we go round Marie’s parents.

It is quite amusing observing Marie’s parents looking at their daughter disapprovingly over the way she flaunts her imposingly big boobs under a tight jumper, along with her bum in white jeans that stretch tautly over her impressive rear. Little did they know that their precious sweet innocent daughter was actually dressing conservatively. Well, conservatively for her, at least.

More amusing though is the way her mum reacts whenever she burps as the drinks flow throughout the day. Clicking her tongue and looking at her daughter open mouthed in shock whenever she releases her gas. If only she knew that she was totally holding back, the burps tame by her usual standards, wondering how she would react if she heard her daughter release one of her typically loud burps.

We get a taxi home, the taxi driver dropping us off at the end of our street shortly after midnight.

Standing outside, I hand the taxi driver a note and say “Keep the change”, and my words are instantly followed by a meaty burp coming from behind me.

The taxi driver looked completely stunned, and not surprising - not only was it a loud sounding burp, let out in the street so late at night it sounded particularly rude and intrusive.

The taxi driver pulls off with the same shocked expression on his face, and I turn around to face Marie who stands there looking straight back at me with a smug look on her face.

“Shh!” I say, genuinely aghast.

She laughs out loud in response, turns her back on me, and makes her way to the pavement.

Stepping on to the pavement she lets out another burp right outside the front door of the first house she comes to, me trailing behind even more stunned by her blatant and obvious rudeness, her second burp just seconds after the first one, even louder this time, and very obviously deliberate.

She continues walking painfully slowly up the street, and as she passes the next house yet another burp emerges from her, another perfectly loud beauty that seems to fill the night air.

This continues all the way home, her slowly walking up the street, me walking behind, as she proceeds to successfully burp very loudly outside every house she walks past - about 12 houses in all, a dozen burps intentionally let out loud and proud for all the neighbours to hear.

Finally home, I am physically shaking at what I had just witnessed, in no doubt that she probably woke up half the street with her late night antics, and wondered just how many neighbours had looked out of their windows to see who was walking up the street belching loudly in order to deliberately disturb them.

As I contemplate her nasty behaviour I catch the conceited smile on her face, looking extremely pleased with herself, and without the slightest trace of shame or embarrassment.

Following her through the lounge I decide to teach the big-headed bitch a lesson.

“That was so funny how your mum kept telling you off all day for burping!” I comment.

Then, as we now make our way through the adjoining Dining Room, I taunt “They weren’t even good burps either!”.

She opens the door to the stairs, turns to face me, and looking me right in the face responds with the most almighty belch, her mouth turning the way it does as she shapes the burp to emerge as noisily as possible.

Her constant burping as she walked up the street was obviously deliberate, and she must have been swallowing air in order to make herself burp. Well, all the leftover air had resulted in the burp she just released, and there must have been a lot of leftover air.

The belch just tore out of her, a solid sounding eruption that emerged at a tremendous level of volume, completely filling the entire house, one of her truly great ones that actually echoes after it has finished.

She laughs with delight, still looking right at me, now with an even more smug superior look, and brags “Good job my mum didn’t hear that one!” and then laughs again.
Last edited by Stormers1972 on 27 Jun 2017, 09:40, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by oleoleoleole » 24 Jun 2017, 16:37

You're an exceptional writer, it's so hard to believe! Each chapter is almost a competition to out-do the last, and in my opinion this most recent one is the cream of the crop so far. I love this!

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Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by LikeNo1EverWas » 24 Jun 2017, 19:44

I most amazed by how you have such a vivid memory of these events. And with minute details as well. Quite amazing, keep at it!

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Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by Stormers1972 » 27 Jun 2017, 09:40

Cheers for the comments guys. I like to think the best is yet to come, as she hasn't reached her peak of debauchery just yet!

As for the vivid memories, witnessing a female burp is a treasured moment to me, and Marie's being such good burps in particular. They remained stored in memory to be relived many times, and when I first got a PC about 6 months or so after the current stories I began typing up the experiences. They would inevitably be deleted out of guilt, only to be retyped again at a later date. I've lost count of the times I've retyped these stories, but I think that helps keep a vivid memory of the moment.

Anyway, more to come...

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Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by Stormers1972 » 27 Jun 2017, 09:43

Chapter 28: Birthday Burps In A Pub Car Park

The restaurant that we choose for my Birthday meal is not the sort of restaurant either of us would normally choose, but then being a Birthday you have to do something different, otherwise where is the treat?

Heading out in the evening I wonder what the other patrons make of the new arrivals. The general dress code appears to be smart casual, leaning towards the smart side, and the age group looks to favour middle aged to older. We were by far the youngest couple.

I instantly feel out of place, but shown to our table and walking through the restaurant Marie appears to be in her element. She is all boobs and leg, teetering on one of her pairs of strappy black sandals, a short purple mini-skirt that ends half way up her thighs, legs looking typically divine in a pair of silky looking black tights. Her cream jumper stretched tautly, with a brown stripe emphasising and enhancing the boobs that bounce suggestively as she walks confidently behind the waiter. A few people glance up as we pass their tables, and a few of those glances linger for longer than is necessary, and I can tell she appreciates the attention.

The meal is expensive, but worth it, and when we leave I notice it is to the same inspection as when we arrived, and this time I observe a lot of the looks are more disapproval. Not surprising, as most other diners are conservatively dressed, so this young girl in a short skirt flaunting both her legs and breasts must have seemed inappropriate.

As we walk through the car park back to our car I walk behind Marie watching the movement of her arse under her skirt, just about tight enough to discretely show the movement of each buttock with each step, but it is the legs that emerge underneath that is the real treat for the eyes as she struts along on her heels, the stilettos making a satisfying sound on the ground, and currently the only sound in the car park.

Marie suddenly stops walking and turns around to me with a smile on her face, a dirty big grin that I have become all too familiar with.

Looking past her I see two couples slowly walking towards us, probably just about in retirement age, all smartly and conservatively dressed, much like most of the other residents in the restaurant that evening.

“I really need to burp!” announces Marie, and even the way she says the word burp seems rude, emphasising the word with delight as if it were something to treasure.

“Well wait until we get in the car!” I reply as the couple get closer, close enough to make out their voices, and they sound every bit as posh as they look.

Marie smiles at my warning, a smile that is both mischievous and defiant.

She turns around, takes a couple of steps further in their direction, and my heart goes in my mouth when the car park is filled by a huge meaty burp.

She was directly in front of them when she did it, no more than ten feet away, and it was obvious she picked that exact moment so she would just about have time to enjoy their reaction, which was of complete horror, the two couple stopping their conversation dead and staring open-mouthed at this tart in front of them who had just let out the most enormous burp. The thing just tore out of her, the sort of belch any man would be proud of, deep, loud, and very powerful.

She continues walking, as do I, not daring to look at her shocked audience any more, fearing their reprimand, as surely judging by their faces they would have to say something, yet she walks slowly passed them relishing the moment. Thankfully, sheer shock stunned them into silence.

Then, right as we walk past them a few seconds later she actually does another one, once again tearing out an absolute beast of a burp the obnoxious sound completely filling the entire car park once again, and I couldn’t believe the audacity of her following up with another one.

Still she wasn’t done, and a third burp emerges taking a little bit longer this time but successfully coming out just as loudly as the first two, moments before we arrive at our car.

I scuttle round to the passenger side as she stands the other side unlocking her door and I’m stunned when I see the look on her face. Whereas I was standing there heart-pounding, stunned by such a disgusting display of burping in a public place, and still fearing that any moment her victims would come over and voice their annoyance, she stands there with the biggest self-satisfied smile across her face looking very proud of herself.

As she gets in the car I watch as she gets into the car the same way she always seems to when she is wearing a short skirt and knows people can see her. She sits down sideways into the seat, lifts her left leg into the car, sits with her skirt gaping open for a moment, then slowly lifts her right leg in. Tonight, she pauses with her legs open for much longer than is necessary.

I stand there cringing, wonder if that really is deliberate, or whether she is just naturally unladylike when she gets in cars. My answer comes in the form of her sitting in the seat looking at me from the window laughing - deliberately making me wait outside to face the angry stares from the two couples before letting me in.

She openly admits it too when she does finally let me in, sitting there with her skirt at the top of her thighs laughing as she taunts me about making me wait outside.

She starts the engine, drives off, and asks “How much money do we have left?”

She burp speaks the word money mid-sentence, and cracks up laughing finding it hilarious.

Back home she sits on the sofa and says “Get me a bottle of Bud!”

It was an order, no please, and assuming she can just demand one of my bottles of beer.

I’m still highly aroused by her car park antics, and such rudeness just increases it.

I fetch her a beer, and one for myself, and sit on the floor. Which as it turns out was a strategic place to be.

She crosses one leg over the other, causing her skirt to ride up her legs, long shapely thigh on display right in front of my eyes. I disappear into the other room to get the camera, and when I return she spots it and sniggers, probably remembering the pictures I took a couple of weeks ago from her works Christmas party, and secretly wondering how long it would be before the camera would come out again.

She sits there nonchalantly sipping her lager as I take a couple of pictures, not posing, not smiling for the camera, just letting me take pictures of her as if she isn’t bothered either way.

Then, she lets out a nice gassy burp, nowhere near close to the size of the ones she did in the car park, but still good and bubbly, and she looks at me chuckling, probably reliving the moment herself.

With that, she upends the bottle, downing the remainder of the bottle in three long swigs as I see the neck action from her draining the gassy liquid. Holding up the empty bottle in my direction she says “Get us another one then!”.

I return with another bottle, hand it to her, and once again she takes it without a word of thanks, and as I resume my position sitting on the floor in front of her she instantly lets out a big gassy burp, putting some throat action into it this time. She had obviously been saving that for my return, now looking down at me with a proud smirk on her face.

She swigs from the fresh bottle of lager greedily, intentionally filling herself full of gas, and sits poised with her mouth half open expectantly, and when the gas arrives she shapes another burp expertly, sniggering with delight this time at her loudest so far, although still not matching the giant burps from the car park earlier.

She uncrosses her legs in front of me, briefly sitting with her legs together demurely, and looking down at me the whole time so she can see my reaction proceeds to slowly open her legs. Sitting now with her legs wide apart, lacy black panties fully on show underneath her tights, she takes another big long swig of her lager, looks down at me smiling when she sees me still gazing up her skirt, and blasts out a good burp in my direction.

I reach across to the coffee table and grab the camera discarded earlier, expecting her to shy away, for those open legs to finally close, but instead she is happy to pose with her legs open as I take pictures up her skirt, smiling the whole time I do it as she sits there casually drinking her beer.

The beer burping and belching goes on for about five minutes or so in all, me sitting obediently on the floor in front of my burping queen, as she sits there drinking my beers and making herself burp looking down at me smiling throughout, and chuckling at her gassy eruptions, highly amused at her rude performance and expecting me to share the amusement.

The five minute display during which she burped around twenty times may have continued, but by now I’m so turned on I can’t resist edging closer and letting my hands go up her skirt, each hand making it’s way up those inviting looking thighs that have been teasing me throughout, my touch feather light against the delicate material of her tights.

“Stand up then!” she says.

I oblige without thinking, and now comes the real Birthday treat as she unzips me, pulling my jeans and underwear around my ankles, eyeing my throbbing cock wantonly, darting her tongue over the tip, before taking me fully into her mouth. As those juicy lips work around my throbbing penis with her pink lipstick leaving an imprint, I think of what she did to those poor couples in the car park, and was soon releasing my load into the back of her throat. She swallows my load, takes off her jumper, peels off her tights and flimsy panties, and hitches up her skirt, spreading those legs once again, only this time with her glistening pussy on show. Letting me know in the most obvious way possible that it is time for me to reciprocate.

I kneel back down and use first my fingers, then my tongue, switching between the two and after going at her a while, sensing by her sounds she is near orgasm I sprawl her back on the sofa and climb on top of her, sure enough bringing her almost instantly to orgasm and going long enough to bring her to a close second one by the time I am done. We lay together on the sofa after, but this is not a moment for cuddles, she is too highly aroused for that, and sensing this I slip a couple of fingers inside of her working at her again, giving her a second orgasm with the middle three fingers of my right hand thrusting into her sodden pussy. This time we did lie together for a while, but t wasn’t long before we found ourselves on the lounge floor where we experimented in a number of positions, our second bout of sexual intercourse a particularly long one bringing a memorable birthday evening to a very good end.

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Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by Stormers1972 » 27 Jun 2017, 11:43

Chapter 29: New Years Mini-Skirt And Burp Fun

For New Years Eve this year we decide not to go out, and agree to get a few drinks and stay at home instead. That doesn’t stop Marie from dressing up as if she was going for a night out though.

I had no idea she was planning to get dressed up, but here she is standing in front of me in all her make-up, a lacy black top that shows her black satin bra underneath, and best of all the brown suede mini-skirt that is now making its second appearance. That bum-skimming short skirt that puts all of her legs on show in her black nylon tights. Her lace-up black leather knee high boots complete the look she was obviously going for - the look of a complete slut. She knows it, and stands there appreciating my reaction at how she is dressed.

We leave the house and, stomping down the road in her boots, she looks across the road at a house with newspaper in the window, the occupiers obviously in the middle of decorating and says in a loud voice “Fucking hell, you’d think they would be able to afford curtains, wouldn’t you?”

She smiles, proud of her degrading comment, obviously intended for the residents of the house to hear and take offence.

We walk around the corner and seeing a bloke walking up the other side of the road towards us Marie takes the opportunity to have some more fun.

“Cor my crotch don’t half itch, you don’t fancy giving it a good scratch do ya?” she says in a loud voice once again, and to my surprise she instantly cups her hand over the front of my jeans and says “Corrrr!" sounding as lewd as possible as she openly gropes my manhood in the middle of the street. This was all done in full view of the bloke walking the other way, who alerted by her crude comment was now looking right at us, which was of course her every intention.

She finally takes her hand away, briefly snickering at her own brashness, and then as we draws almost parallel to the poor man across the road she emits a throaty burp with enough volume to fill the night air, closely followed by the sound of her laughing out loud announcing her own amusement, and once she recovers from her own hilarity she asks with open delight “Did he look when I did that?”.

In the shop, I hadn’t yet recovered from the shock of her rude behaviour on the brief walk there, but I am in for a further shock at the hands of my girlfriend’s increasingly slutty antics.

After getting my drink I go and get some crisps and return to the drinks aisle, turning the corner to see Marie now bent right over inspecting the bottles on the bottom shelf. It instantly brought back memories of when she did something identical when she was wearing another mini-skirt of hers, in an off-licence, several months back. Only this skirt was much shorter, and right now was very suggestively exposing half her bum cheeks. The drink aisle, as with so many supermarkets like this, was right next to the tills enabling the staff to observe it and combat the shoplifting of the most obvious and expensive items in the shop. Right now those staff, and the queues of people waiting to get served, were observing this filthy young tart very obviously flaunting her arse.

After admiring the view myself, and coming to the conclusion that she is being far too rude and obvious, her bum jutting out behind her as she takes her time looking at the bottles of drink, I go over and warn her.

“Marie! You do realise your bum is showing when you bend over like that!”

She stands upright, looking me right in the face and taunts me, responding sarcastically with mock innocence “Oh is it! Oh I never knew! Oh dear!”.

She then glances at the queue of people at the checkout, looks back towards me, and says in a loud voice, fully intending her audience to hear “Is that why the blokes in the queue kept looking, do you reckon they were taking a good look of my arse?”.

The way she was loudly boasting was just shameless and, as I stood rooted to the spot stunned by just how dirty she was being tonight, she turns her back on me, instantly picking up two four packs she already had every intention of buying, and walks off to join one of the queues, leaving me still standing there in my state of shock.

Back home we put the drink in the fridge, with a few in the freezer to chill quicker, and phone for a pizza. As soon as Marie puts the phone down I’m all over her. She responds well too, lying back on the sofa and pulling me on top, opening her legs up invitingly and lifting her knees when I position myself between her legs. Pulling away from a particularly long and passionate kiss she gives me a naughty grin and says “Do you fancy seeing if you can shag me before the pizza arrives?”

I’m instantly standing up to unzip, and realising I’m up for the challenge she sits up with a naughty grin on her face as she puts her hands behind her back, and looking at my bulging penis with a greedy look in her eye casts her bra aside with one swift movement as she says “I fancy getting shagged on the lounge floor!”.

Pulling the coffee table aside she lies on the floor, lifting her knees up and parting her legs just like she had done on the sofa, letting her skirt fall around her hips as she lifts her bum off the floor and hitches down her tights and panties to reveal the neat line of pubic hair above her perfect pussy lips.

I join her on the floor and as I sink my length into her she gasps with instant passion, wrapping her boots around my waist as she responds to my thrusts, both working hard and fast to finish before the deliveryman arrives. I was so turned on it wasn’t a difficult challenge. Pulling her tights and panties back up she observes with amusement “I reckon I might have some carpet burns after that!”.

I fetch us drinks from the freezer as she unties the laces of her boots, both removed by the time I come back, and she takes her drink from me without a word of acknowledgement or thanks as she starts channel hopping with the remote. I’m used to such acts of rudeness, sometimes I find it quite disrespectful, but mostly, and particularly during evenings full of promise such as this, it enhances the experience. Overall, I loved the fact my girlfriend had turned into such a filthy ill-mannered little bitch.

She drains half her drink in one go, puts her drink down, and changes channels again as I watch her expecting a belch. I see her swallow, fighting against gas, and it comes as a shock - a very rare moment for her to stifle an obvious opportunity to burp, containing it rather than forcing it to come out as loudly as possible. A moment later, after another long swig, she does the same. It is in complete contrast to the first half hour of the evening in which she had made several crude comments, burped in front of a stranger, flashed her arse to several more strangers, and got shagged on the lounge floor.

The doorbell finally goes, and Marie looks down at her lacy black top, the outline of her rounded boobs showing underneath, her big nipples pressed firmly against the see-through material.

“Err...I think you had better answer that don’t you?!” she says after proudly admiring the assets that were clearly on show.

I open the door to the pizza deliveryman, and a gigantic belch suddenly comes from the sofa, one of her astonishingly loud and powerful solid sounding burps that doesn’t falter throughout, just explodes at a huge level of volume and stays there for the duration. The deliveryman looks at me with a shocked expression, his shock growing when the burp is followed by female laughter, a dirty sounding cackle letting us both know just how funny she found it.

She is still laughing when I close the door, hugely embarrassed, and seeing my flustered face just makes her laugh even more, asking “What did he do?” when the laughter finally subsides, only to start up again when I feed her ego by letting her know how shocked and embarrassed he looked. I realised now why she hadn’t let out her gas earlier, she was planning to save it so she could burp in front of another total stranger!

After the pizza I get us drinks and return to the lounge. She takes her drink, waits for me to sit down and lifts her legs over my lap guzzling her drink as I let my eyes drift to the sexy legs stretched out in front of me. After several swallows of her drink, downing half of it in one go once again she puts her hand on her stomach as she sucks it in, her boobs swelling and becoming more prominent in the see-through lacy top, the sight diverting my eyes from her legs as she lets out a big meaty power burp right into my face. Laughing with delight she brags “I hope the neighbours aren’t planning on having a quiet night in! They won’t get it with me around!”.

We eventually settled on watching a double bill of Predator and Predator 2 showing on one of the Sky movie channels. We made it through the first film, just, but her regularly burping out loud not caring that her mouth was in such close proximity to my face as she let them out typically forcefully, it was a close call. I had a hand resting on her thigh, and that hand was soon exploring, me kissing her neck, but she was either teasingly resisting, or genuinely into the film. Fortunately the sequel didn’t seem to hold her interest quite so well and we saw in the new year in the best way possible.

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Joined: 19 Aug 2012, 10:23
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Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by mephistofele » 28 Jun 2017, 21:30

amazing as always

Posts: 172
Joined: 15 Nov 2008, 11:14
Gender: Male - Male

Re: How To Burp Like A Slut And Offend Everyone - Non Fiction

Post by Stormers1972 » 29 Jun 2017, 13:37

Chapter 30: The St Valentines Burping Massacre

With Valentines Day fast approaching Marie's friend Kirsty decides to throw an Anne Summers party.

On the evening in question, I pick up a drunken girlfriend late at night, and when we get home she cannot contain her excitement. She tells me I would have loved to have been there, Kirsty’s lounge full of women all stripping off and trying on a variety of saucy garments. Apparently, after a few glasses of wine the sex toys came out, and both Kirsty and Jeanette openly admitted to already owning some. I just imagined these two women showing off their burps at work, then using sex toys on themselves when they got back home.

The tension builds as I eye her Anne Summers bag and wonder what is contained inside. I’d hoped for stockings, and the thought of her using a sex toy in front of me was a hugely erotic if unlikely concept. But alas her purchase was a single matching pair of pair of bra and knickers. Although, it had to be said, the gold and black lacy set looked very sexy, even sexier than the ones she already owned. When she told me she would save her new purchase for Valentines Day, it became a day that I looked forward to immensely.

On the evening itself I start cooking dinner, and Marie stands in the kitchen doorway saying she is going to “get ready” before disappearing upstairs, returning just as I am ready to serve.

Her long blonde hair has been made wavy and falls over her shoulders, her eyes look particularly smouldering in her eye-liner, and those kissable lips look so sensual in my favourite pink lipstick.

Her face with the perfect amount of make-up would have been enough alone to seduce me, but the way she is dressed is just something else.

She is wearing a new denim mini-dress, which I have seen, but until now had not seen her wearing. It is tight enough to emphasise the curves of her bust and hips, and with buttons all the way up the front I can see she has left the top button undone to put a bit of well-proportioned cleavage on show.

I go back into the kitchen to get our plates and return as she is sitting down, getting a better view now from above deep into that plunging cleavage, then notice she must have left a couple of buttons undone at the bottom too, the hem of her dress at about mid-thigh rising as she sits down, and gaping open to display even more leg in her light black tights.

Sitting down to join her I curse the romantic candlelight setting, the semi-darkness allowing me only a restrained look at the beautiful sight of those thighs through the glass dining table, and I’m sure in full light I would have had a look all the way up to her underwear. Then she lifts her right leg over her left, and it is all I can do to resist snuffing out the candle and putting all the lights on at the sight of so much thigh. Guess I will have to be patient.

We are a few mouthfuls into the meal when I look up just in time to see her turning her juicy pink lips to the side, the way she does to shape the biggest burp possible, and seeming to effortlessly produce a boistrously loud vibrating burp.

By now, I’m used to her doing this every mealtime, often into double figures if she is in a rude enough mood. Somehow though, my candlelit setting made it seem particularly inappropriate and offensive. I instantly discover that she realises this too, and when I catch the look of amusement on her face I can see she looks even more pleased with herself than normal after releasing such an impressive burp, the romantic situation just adding to the inappropriateness, and therefore to her just adding to the appeal and enjoyment of doing it.

She does it throughout the meal, and very obviously makes a real a point of burping as loudly and as often as possible, being really disgusting about it. The more she does it, the more pleased she looks with herself, which in itself just seems to spur her on to continue.

So, after the meal, when she sits on my lap to exchange cards and presents, I’m focused entirely on her and her alone, the big comely bum squirming around on my lap, the generous cleavage right in front of my eyes, and those long luscious legs. I’ve got my hand wrapped around her waist, and I’m guessing she must have felt me pressing underneath her, unable to hide my uncontrollable urge to just fuck this filthy girl sitting on my lap, a girl so filthy she got a kick out of burping throughout the candlelit meal her boyfriend had lovingly prepared for her.

Cards and presents exchanged she grabs a second bottle of fizzy wine from the fridge and motions for me to join her upstairs. Grabbing our wine glasses I follow from a few steps behind, looking up at those amazing legs and realising my own legs are shaking. Together now for a year and a half and yet she can still have this overwhelming impact on me sexually.
She puts the bottle down on my bedside cabinet and sprawls herself out on the bed. I pour her a glass of wine, realising my hand is shaking as much as my legs on the stairs as I pass it to her, joining her on the bed, then roll on to my side to pour myself a glass.

I have just put the bottle down, the process of pouring myself a glass of wine taking no longer than five seconds when a huge belch comes from behind me. This was just an explosion of gas, and I could tell she put some extra force behind it too, the bassy gurgling eruption filling the room at a disgustingly loud volume.

The burp is almost immediately followed by the sound of one of the young kids in the bedroom next door starting to cry, a moment not lost on Marie. She starts laughing, realising her loud burp was probably the cause of him waking him up, a prospect she evidently found hilarious. Still laughing, she hands me back her empty glass, ignoring my shocked expression at both her burp and her empty glass, and says “Well fill me up then!...Then you can really fill me up!”.

I oblige pouring her another glass, the sound of the neighbours dad pounding up the stairs offering his son reassuring words causing Marie to start sniggering with delight once again.

I start at her neck, and make my way down to the cleavage just below, kissing her right between each bulging breast and start to unbutton her to release the monsters underneath.

I go to kiss her on the lips, but she lifts a finger to stop me, and says “No! I want you to kiss my feet!”

“What?” I ask

“You heard me! Get at the end of the bed and kiss my feet. As its Valentines Day I think you should treat me special and worship my feet!”.

Like she has treated me special so far, belching throughout the meal I lovingly prepared, and not saying a word of thanks for it either. But, as she knows, I’m powerless. I’m going to do anything she wants. The smile on her face right now tells me she knows that, and that she intends to fully manipulate the fact.

I get up and stand at the end of the bed, foot worship a complete new experience to me, and as far I know her too, despite her casual request. I cup her right foot into a hand and lift it in the air and begin massaging her sole with my thumbs. Then I kiss the sole, and realise I like this, the feel of her tights giving it added appeal. Spotting her toenails freshly painted in blue nail polish, I take her toes into my mouth and suck delicately. All of a sudden I’ve become a master at foot worship and do the same to the other foot, and look up too see her sitting there with a little smile on her face, delicately sipping her wine, looking like the very queen she demanded I worship. This drives my passion yet further, I really very badly need to fuck her.

I make my way up her legs, taking my time to enjoy them despite my overpowering urges, and as I work my way up her thighs, she opens her legs to invite me yet higher, her dress gaping open with her lacy black and gold panties on display directly in front of me. See-through enough to see her neat trimmed strip of pubic hair, and closer still her pussy lips, kissing them and feeling their moist warmth through the flimsy material.

If I was to say I lasted a minute, I’d be exaggerating. I was so aroused I would estimate at 30 seconds.

I lay next to her, ashamed, this beautiful sexy horny girlfriend of mine, and all I could give her was 30 seconds.

She wasn’t about to let me off either.

Not the type of girlfriend to offer words of reassurance, “it could happen to anyone”, to her this was another opening for her to enjoy some more bitchy behaviour.

With her legs still spread the way I had left them, she grabs the bottle of wine and swigs straight from the bottle as she proceeds to humiliate me, openly mocking my performance, a few comments followed by nasty little sniggers, before she deliers “You should have invited some of your mates round!”.

“Actually!” she says, sitting upright, “That isn’t a bad idea! I’d quite like to be fucked by 3 or 4 blokes!”.

She chuckles with real delight at that one, and adds in a dirty leering way “Corrrrrr!!!” as if imagining it, and takes another swig straight from the bottle, tipping the bottle up and greedily sucking from the neck.

The sight of her sitting with her legs spread swigging from a bottle of wine, mocking me and boasting about her lewd fantasies, was already getting me going again.

Then, after draining the remainder of the bottle, 3 glasses worth for her and just 1 for me, she takes it from her mouth, sits with her mouth poised to the side in that dirty pre-burp expression of hers, gives her toned stomach a little encouraging rub, and lets out a rip-roaring burp, emerging offensively loud as always but then getting some added power behind it, the giant belch echoing round the room at such a high volume it just beggars belief how anyone can produce such loud powerful burps, or come to that be rude enough to actually do it.

Then the kid next door starts crying, and shouts “Daddy!” causing her to burst out laughing as she says “Oops! Hope they weren’t planning on having a romantic night in!”.

Her nasty behaviour had brought me back to a respectable erection, and climbing back on top of her it wasn’t long before she did the extra work needed. Second time around I lasted more like 30 minutes than 30 seconds, as we romped around the bed with Marie thoroughly enjoying herself getting filled full of cock. Although I suspect some of her audible pleasure, seeming to be greatly exaggerated, was to upset the kids next door rather than of genuine pleasure.

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